The Committed Believer · Parents, Kinship & Neighbours

Honoring Family and Neighbors in Islam

Understanding duties towards family and neighbors according to Islamic teachings.

6 questions · Medium · about 3 minutes

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6 questions, about 3 minutes.

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1. How should a Muslim treat non-Muslim family members?

  • Treat them kindly, maintain family ties, and call them to Islam with wisdom. (correct answer)
  • Sever all ties with them after becoming Muslim.
  • Visit them only if they first show interest in Islam.
  • Join their religious festivals to preserve family relations.

Why

Islam does not prevent a Muslim from meeting non-Muslim family members. Rather, it encourages better treatment, good character, and maintaining family ties so that the Muslim becomes a good example and may help guide them. The Muslim should not obey them in disbelief or sin, and should avoid forbidden matters such as free mixing, shaking hands with non-mahrams, and joining their religious festivals. Gifts may be exchanged if they are not connected to their religious festivals.

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2. What should a new Muslim do when family members oppose their Islam?

  • Remain firm in Islam while treating them kindly and praying for their guidance. (correct answer)
  • Leave Islam to keep the family pleased.
  • Avoid them completely until they accept Islam.
  • Argue harshly until they agree.

Why

A new Muslim should remain steadfast and not obey anyone in disbelief or sin, even parents. At the same time, Islam commands kind treatment of parents and relatives, even if they oppose the person’s Islam. The Muslim should be compassionate, make du‘a for their guidance, use wise methods of da‘wah, and avoid despair. Family opposition is a test, not a reason to give up the truth.

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3. What should children do if their father mistreats them and neglects prayer?

  • Advise him, seek help from wise relatives, and continue treating him kindly. (correct answer)
  • Cut him off completely until he repents.
  • Confront him aggressively.
  • Ignore his religious condition and only focus on themselves.

Why

Neglecting prayer is a grave matter, and the father should be advised with wisdom and various means, including help from relatives who may influence him. His harshness and sins do not cancel his right to good treatment from his children. They should not forsake or cut him off in a way that worsens matters; rather, they should draw close to him with mercy, advise him, and pray that Allah guides him.

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4. What is one of the most important ways to be dutiful to parents while they are alive?

  • Obey them in what is right and does not involve disobedience to Allah. (correct answer)
  • Obey them in every instruction, even sinful ones.
  • Only make du‘a for them after they die.
  • Replace good treatment with financial support only.

Why

Being dutiful to parents includes kind treatment in word and deed, obeying them in what is right, making du‘a for them, caring for them when they need help, and avoiding anything that offends them. Obedience to parents is not absolute: if they command disobedience to Allah, they are not obeyed in that. After their death, a child may honour them by paying debts, performing Hajj on their behalf if needed, praying for mercy and forgiveness, and maintaining ties with those they loved.

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5. What is the ruling on thanking Allah and also thanking one’s parents?

  • It is permissible, but should not be treated as a fixed narrated dhikr. (correct answer)
  • It is forbidden to thank parents.
  • It replaces the need to thank Allah.
  • It is required to say this exact phrase every day.

Why

Honouring parents is one of the greatest means of drawing close to Allah, and gratitude to parents is part of fulfilling their rights. A person may thank Allah and also thank their parents, because Allah commands gratitude to Him and to parents. However, combining the two in a particular phrase should not be made into a regular fixed dhikr as though it were narrated from the Prophet ﷺ, because there is no report establishing such a fixed wording.

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6. Can a person combine marriage with caring for elderly parents?

  • Yes, these responsibilities can often be arranged together. (correct answer)
  • No, marriage must always be delayed until parents no longer need help.
  • No, marriage cancels the duty to help parents.
  • Yes, but only if the parents do not need financial support.

Why

Honouring parents is a great act of worship, and keeping oneself chaste through marriage is also important, especially when temptation is feared. These two responsibilities do not necessarily conflict. A person may choose a spouse and living arrangement that allows continued care for parents, such as staying in the same city or close by. Financial help should be given according to ability. If caring for parents and younger siblings can be organized without missing the opportunity for marriage, that is best.

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A note on these answers

These questions are for learning and self-testing. Explanations are drawn from the sources linked on each question and are not a fatwa. For a ruling on your own circumstances, please consult a qualified scholar.

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